Fix Me

To be completely honest, I once considered having plastic surgery because I hated my body. After having three children, my stomach wasn’t as flat as it once was. I gained a considerable amount of weight, and I just wanted zero parts of my new body. At the time, I didn’t fully understand nor did I realize just how much my body would change after giving birth to three children. So, I decided that plastic surgery would prove to be the perfect fix. I was thin and fit once upon a time, and I wanted to get back to that. I wanted to get back to that body quick, and scrolling through social media didn’t help. I used to wear cropped tops all the time. My stomach used to be my most favorite part of my body. I was always showing it off and I wanted to be able to do that again. I wanted to wear bikinis on the beach. I just didn’t feel sexy, and I wanted to feel sexy again. I didn’t believe I could be sexy again or wear some of the same things until I fixed my body. My body wasn’t pretty and I hated what I saw in the mirror.

The internet is filled with false expectations, and misinterpretations of a woman’s body form. They lead you to believe that all women should have flat stomaches, small waists, and big butts. They want you to believe that once the baby is born, it’s all about the rapid bounce back or the snap back. It’s misleading and it has never been my reality. The truth is that all of our bodies are different, and respond differently after giving birth. There’s no need to rush, and there is nothing wrong with real natural bodies. Social Media has some of us questioning whether a woman’s natural body is real or not simply because so many women are getting surgery nowadays. It’s hard for some to believe the same body built in the operating room, can also be built in the gym. It can be done and it has been done. I was so close to jumping on that operating table because I was insecure, I fell into the social media trap, and I just felt unattractive. Then I woke up, and I thought about it more and more. I thought about it deeper. I had to ask myself some very imperative questions. Why was I doing this? What are the side effects? Is it going to fix my insecurities? Is it going to make me feel better? Is it going to make me pretty? Is it going to make me more desirable? Is it going to fix me? When I answered these questions, I knew that I couldn’t go through with the surgery. I couldn’t. Yes plastic surgery would’ve fixed my outer appearance, but it wouldn’t fix my struggles within. I had LOTS of struggles buried inside of me, and it would’ve only served as a temporary mask. I am in no way knocking women who’ve gotten or who are thinking about getting plastic surgery. Do whatever makes you happy! But you should know that plastic surgery is not a cure for insecurities, or a lack of self love and self validation. You can sweep your shit under the rug all day, but it’ll still be there under the rug, waiting on you to deal with it. I’m saying if you’re going to do it, make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons. No I didn’t go through with the surgery, but I did change my eating habits. I did go to the gym. I also started being more kind to myself, more patient with myself, and I started my long journey to self love. It sure wasn’t a quick process nor was it easy. However, it was worth it!!!